Just Little Things

Hey there, everyone! Happy New Year! Sad news about Rodwell. Having worked with him a bit during PST, it's strange that he's not there. I picture him, out of the hospital from his surgery, back at training, doing the cross-culture skit depicting Malawian funerals and heading up the discussion afterwards; ironic that he should then be the subject of his teaching so soon thereafter. It's life, but boy, it's in your face every day over there. There's something I miss about that intensity - not the death and dying, of course, but the lack of distraction and things that allow you to dissociate from the difficulties. Anyway...

I am in California this week, and guess who's coming to lunch tomorrow? That's right! Tommy Swan! Yay!

I haven't any nutty stories, but I can say that I have noticed a few little things that make me realize my head is not all the way here yet. For example, I was standing in line for a coffee in the airport and realized after about fifty seconds of not inching forward that I might be standing a little too close to the woman in front of me because I can sort of feel my breath bouncing off her shoulder, and perhaps she wouldn't like that. Later on, upon landing, I looked out the window and saw a guy out on the tarmac and it struck me odd, for a hint of an instant, that he was white. One of my first forays to the mall in my car had me noticing the white people in their vehicles and looking to see if I recognized any of them. It slowly dawned on me what I was doing and I realized I really needed to pay more attention to traffic because I would have been looking at nearly everyone! I have found myself awkwardly accepting the salt and pepper with two hands, or holding my right arm with the left just to hand someone a pen. The other day I curtsied to a friend as I left the room to do her a favor. Thankfully no one else notices these things, but I catch myself in the middle of them, saying in my head, "You don't need to do that, it doesn't mean anything now." I guess it's a matter of sorting out what will continue to have meaning and what to let go.

I am sort of dreading the process of determining what I will be doing for work. I feel myself gearing up to procrastinate. Well, I'll start thinking about it next week.

I am also enjoying everyone's notes. This was a good idea. And Steph - thanks for the heads-up about the Corps Care stuff. I was able to check mine out - though luckily all is well.

All the best to those of you still traveling. Come home safely.

Until the next time -
Iam, Martha